Lo and behold...

Sometimes, when I'm actually focusing on work and not my problems... a song comes on. And halfway through I realize that my soul is avidly listening to the words. It hasn't happened in a while, but it did today!

Angels and Airwaves: Everything's Magic

And do you ever feel like you're alone?
And do you ever wish you'd be unknown?
I could say that I have..
I could say that I have..
And do you ever feel things here aren't right?
And do you ever feel the time slip by?
I can say that I have..
And I can say that I have..

So hear this please
And watch as your heart speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and i'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic

And do you ever lay awake at night?
And do you ever tell yourself don't try?
Don't try to let yourself down
Don't try to let yourself down
And do you ever see yourself in love?
And do you ever take a chance, my love?
Because you know that I will..
Because you know that I will..

So hear this please
And watch as your hearts speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and i'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic
Everything, everything's magic

So hear this please
And watch as your hearts speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything, everything's magic
Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand, and i'll make you mine
Everything, everything's magic

That's what I want. :D I actually accomplished one thing for school today, that's amazing with my recent track record. I think.... I'm back to me again. I reminded myself to stop caring so much about something that in reality doesn't change a thing for me, and focus on my goals, my wants, my needs, and how to get where I want to be. Why do I allow my relationships to derail me so much sometimes?? I'm a born giver, and there are days I wouldn't change that for anything but it has hurt me more than helped me so often in my life. Silly girl, will I never learn. The lovely part is, once I work through something... it feels like dawn breaking after the longest, coldest, bitterest night... and you can smell spring in the air. That's how I felt when I got up this morning. I'm sure there are probably still dark nights ahead, but I'll take this return to happiness and sanity and my center all the same. And remember it, and know that if I want it, my spring will come again. This wasn't the darkest place I've ever been anyway, in fact it wasn't even half bad, haha. I just hate that it de-motivated me for weeks, and left me disappointed in myself and my work ethic and accomplishments in the school arena lately. You know what the cure for that is though? Work, motivation, and appropriate focus. Bring it on.